Albert in the Birds on the Bat

Albert in the Birds on the Bat

The outlook seemed brilliant for the Cardinal winter meeting:

The bidders were down to three or two but their grasps ‘peared only fleeting.

And then when Reyes signed down South, and Bell did the same,

A sickly silence fell upon the fandom of “the Mang.”

Many stated coldly that the Redbirds should send him packing,

For, they thought, that Albert’s salary would only bring the team to lacking.

Others thought it would be worth the risk to put up more than that-

Put up more money to keep him wearing the Birds on the Bat.

Although his numbers had declined, yet so many records he could break,

It was history, loyalty, and home-team pride that was at stake;

Upon the stricken Cardinal-nation such ambiguity doth sat;

There was a divide among the faithful over the price of Albert’s bat.

The Marlins made an offer to the wonderment of all.

The Angels, the silent, had made no attempt so far this fall;

Then the cloud had lifted, and people saw what had occurred,

For the Fish had signed Buehrle thus no longer could afford.

From millions of throats and more there rose a lusty yell;

It rumbled through the archway, it rattled through Foristell;

It knocked over the Rocky Mountains and beyond way more than that.

For Albert, so it seemed, would again wear the Birds on the Bat.

Throughout the years Pujols stated that St. Louis was his place;

That this is where Albert wanted to always keep his space.

And when money had been mentioned, he almost always spat-

"There’s more to me than money; there’s more to me than that."

Whether at home or on the road thousands would cheer him and stand;

He rarely failed to disappoint the 46,861 who were on hand.

For it can never be said that what he gave wasn’t surely worth the trip,

And whether he stayed or went, for this may our hat we will always tip.

Looking back we can remember his many fantastic years,

Killing Cubs, whipping the Astros, demolishing any thrown spheres.

Always close by LaRussa’s lips many complements would shed,

“He’s the greatest I’ve ever coached,” the manager had said.

From off the pitch of Lidge in October two-thousand and five;

His bat did so much damage it made us fans alive.

Thanksgiving for two-thousand eleven and don’t forget Oh-6.

His play was always exciting and we were always in the mix.

With a smile of Christian charity great Albert always shone;

And he practiced so relentlessly so his craft he could always hone.

He tortured opposing pitching, and although allegations flew,

He stands as one who played the game clean, truly through and through.

But now the faithful hear of what had been some debate;

A mystery team also had put an offer upon Albert’s plate.

They say Albert’s face grew stern and cold, they said his muscles did strain,

As he pondered a deal that may not come by his way again.

The Angels, now revealed from secrecy, had offered him so much,

A deal so great it would have made Solomon to blush.

And now the Angels held the deal, and how they let it show,

That the baseball world was duly stunned by the amount of Angel dough.

Oh, sometime in the future, the sun will again shine bright;

Sometime the Cardinals will be winning, and everything will be alright,

And sometime we’ll again be laughing, with cheering and a shout;

But today, there is no joy in St. Louis – mighty Albert has walked out. 

-CJ (Obviously based upon "Casey at the Bat" by Ernest Thayer.)