Okay...something has got to be done. We the fans are not intelligent enough, apparently, to vote for the best player. We'll keep a running count of when the fans get it right and when they don't. (Stats don't lie...usually). (Stats will only get a "point" when the public is wrong). Now some people might object that injuries aren't the player's fault and doesn't show who is the best player. Was Ripken's streak just luck? In order to deserve an All-Star vote....you have to play. Oh and another thing. I know its a little early. All the more reason to get on to the millions who have already cast their ballots. ****AND BECAUSE SOME FEEL THAT MY LACK OF USE OF stats like SLG AND OBP IS A SIGN THAT I am part of the public I accuse let me say this: YOU ARE RIGHT. KINDA...read the comments for further details.
Starting at 1B:
1B-NL Albert Pujols has over twice as many votes as Derrek Lee. This is despite the fact that Lee has a .385 BA over Albert's .338, 3 more runs, 3 more HRs, 7 more RBI's, and 4 more stolen bases. AND all this on an inferior team. Eck is getting on base--a lot. Edmond's poor performance as of late and Sanders in a slight slump recently might contribute to a lack of protection for Albert. In addition, I think that Albert's stats will rise and Lee's will come back to earth. However, as it stands now one should not select Albert over Lee. However I wouldn't fault you too much--'cause its Albert.
Stats 1 Morons 0
1B-AL Hold on to your wigs and keys kids. This is ugly. Maybe the ugliest. Tino Martinez (Card's fans may get warm fuzzies voting for this likeable guy but come on) is leading in the AL. Who's second? Kevin Millar. Third? Paul Konerko. You have to get to the fourth to get to the best AL first baseman, Mark Teixeira (that's a doozy to spell). Here are their respective stats. Brace yourself. BA: Martinez .238!!!!! Millar .255!!!!! Konerko .228!!!!! Teixeira a lousy .303. HR's, I suppose, is what they have in common? Teixeira and Konerko with 14, Tino with 12 and Millar with 4. Never mind. Mark has 13 more Runs than the nearest of these 3 fan favs, more RBI's, and even leads, tied with Tino, in SB! SB is singular. (Whaddya want? They're 1B not jack rabbits).
Stats 2 Forest Gumps 0
2B-NL Good. We needed to recover from that last one. Kent has twice the amount of votes that 3rd place Grud has. Despite Grud's strikingly better BA, Kent's power with 11 HR's (3 for Grud), and he leads Grud in just about every other category despite being on such a poor team means that the morons aren't O-fer any more.
Stats 2 Kids 1
2B-AL Very well done for the kids here as well. Soriano and Roberts are neck and neck. Roberts has an astronomical BA while Soriano has 4 more dingers. Soriano leads in most of the other categories because of the hammerin' Texas lineup. The Orioles aren't slouches either. Fan's get it right again. Wonders never cease.
Stats 2 Public 2
SS-NL Just when you thought things were going well. Our vote leader: Nomar Garciapara. The man has been on the DL SINCE HIS 51st AB AND UP UNTIL THEN...wait for it...he was batting .157 with ZERO, count them again if you have to, ZERO HR's. Tino take a seat. This is the worst. Below is listed the NL SS's who would qualify over Nomar **takes a big breath*** Barmes, Perez, Izturis, Reyes, Lopez, Rollins, Vizquel, Eckstein, Furcal, Hall, Blum, Everett, Gonzalez, Greene, Clayton, Wilson, Aurillia, Perez, Cintron, Hardy, Guzman, Woodward, Jackson, Vizcaino, and finally Jesse Garcia--the fourth Padres' SS on our list and despite fewer AB's managed more HRs.
Stats 3 Bad idea when cousins marry 2
SS-AL Tejada has the most--as he should.
Stats 3 Average Joe 3
3B-NL Scotty Rolen has a commanding lead despite only playing in 30 games and sporting a .257 batting average. Second place isn't any better with Chipper Jones only playing in 30 as well but has better stats in EVERY category known to man-kind than Rolen. How do you justify voting for 2 guys who have played only half the season. Glaus is third, and while he is strokin' em with 13 HRs, he's got a pathetic .251. Hardly a All-Star Starter. A surprising Ensberg or Wright would be much better choices--both with power AND BA.
Stats 4 Highest Order of Primates 3
3B-AL A-Rod is dominating. Glad he's on my fantasy team.
Stats 4 Peeps 4
C-NL Another one bites the dust. San Diego's Ramon Hernandez is far and away the best NL Catcher. Yet he has so few votes that he doesn't even register (I assume he has at least some votes). Let's compare Hernandez with the top 5 NL Catcher vote getters. BA: Hernandez .289, Piazza .253, La Duca .287, Estrada .275, our own Yadier .250, Barrett .275 Runs: Her 25, Piaz 21, LD 17, Yoda 17, Barr 15 HR's: Her 6, Piaz 6, LD 2, Yoda 2, Barr 5 RBI's: Her 31, Piaz 22, LD 21, Yoda 17, and Barr 23. You do the math. Unless you're one of...them. Then trust my math when I say he's "far and away."
Stats 5 Brain Farts 4
C-AL At least they get it right on this end. But Ivan could sneak up and steal it from the deserving Veritek. Jason is lucky that he plays in Boston so he gets the votes.
Stats 5 Bob and Company 5
(OF is worth 1 a piece)
OF-NL Who should be there: Miguel Cabrera and Bobby Abreu for sure; than okay picks would be Carlos Lee, Brady Clark, Pat Burrell, or Milton Bradley. Who's the top three in votes? Carlos Beltran, Jim Edmonds (close but no cigar), and Ken Griffey Jr. Residents geniuses drop 3 on this one. AH but I can foresee the comments and emails now: "But John, they didn't put Bonds up there at least." No they didn't. But for a guy who hasn't even picked up Don Baylor's tooth-pick let alone a bat all season 138,000+ future Ivy leaguers put up their arms for the SF out-outfielder. Not enough to get him into the All-Star game but enough to show the fan's ineptitude.
Stats 8 Larry, Moe, Curly, and the other guy too 5
OF-AL Who belongs? Sheffield and Damon....Ichiro, Garret Anderson, Rondell White, or even Trot Nixon would have sufficed. Instead? Vlad (not a terrible choice in the face of a small injury [but see note above]) and Manny. MIT grads got one right with Ichiro.
Stats 10 "Happy Hands Club" rejects 6
DH-NL You're probably one of the ones who voted for Nomar and Bonds aren't you?
DH-AL We'll end on a note that might bring some hope to humanity. Ortiz. But I'm betting that the reason he has the most votes is not because of his stats but because he's the only DH they know of.
Stats 10 Napoleon Dynamite under-study 7
Conclusion: Have sportswriters, players, coaches, managers, bat-boys, or monkeys at type writers do the All-Star voting instead. Sure they got several right. That's not the point. The fact is the public has blown so many but such a wide margin. There are deserving players out there who are getting robbed of the honor they deserve.
Homer's Brain to Homer: "That's it I'm out of here." ***Footsteps. Door opens and closes.***